Every day when we go out into the world, we never know who or what we are going to run into.  We don’t know if we will come across people that are in a good mood or a foul, nasty one.  Either way, it should have no bearing on us or own mood.

Why shouldn’t it, you ask?  Because we can’t control other people.  We can’t make them talk to us or treat us the way we should be treated, and we can’t allow their bad behavior and choices of words and actions, to cut us and to bring us down with them.  Because honestly that is all they are doing.  They are projecting outward how they feel on the inside, and we just happen to be in the line of fire.

Does it make it ok or right? HELL NO!  BUT, that’s when we need to take a moment and decided whether this really has anything at all to do with us, or if these people may be going thru a terrible time or under a lot of extra added stress.  Again it doesn’t make it right, but I bet if we try to put our selves in their situation or give them the benefit of the doubt we will surely see that we have been in their place and not always behaved the way we know we should have.

No one is perfect after all, and we can all think of a time or two when we snapped at someone for no reason other than we were annoyed at something else: stressed over bills, kids, work, home life, whatever.  For that reason alone, in some random moment, we just snapped!

Now what all that being said, everyone needs to learn how to put a little sugar on their responses, add a little cheer.  Smile at someone who looks to be foul that day.  Go out of our way to try and change the attitude of the person being nasty to us.  It’s HARD as shit sometimes, to not take their perceived attacks personally.  Trust me I know.  I struggled with that for a long time.  Everything was personal and I must be one horrible person for people to EVER treat me or talk to me in that way.  What I have come to accept, though, is I am not a horrible person, and how someone treats me is not a reflection of who I truly am.  It’s a reflection of them they are just projecting onto me.

I decided one day that I was no longer going to take things to heart so much, and now if they yell and cusses at me, I giggle, especially if it’s in text and email.   I can just picture them pounding away on that keyboard all red faced and steam coming out of their ears.  And I’m sorry, but it makes me giggle.  I just think how much energy is being wasted on being upset and negative.  Haven’t you ever heard the old saying you get more flies with honey than vinegar?  It’s true for a reason.

If we want people to respond to us and respect and value us and our opinions, we won’t get that from being nasty, angry or trying to put the fear of God into someone.  Some people may respond to that because they are scared or worried, but then you have someone that just jumps thru hoops out of desperation not out of admiration and respect.

People respond to respect, to being firm but fair and to being helpful.  I know I certainly do.  I give respect and expect the same in return.  And if you yell at me for no good reason – hell, for any reason – if there is venom in it, I will smile and try to understand the first time.  The second time, though, you will get SMACKED!  LOL

Let’s just try to treat and talk to people the way we want to be treated and talked to, and we all will be better off for it!