Tomorrow is Mother’s Day and that day always brings up a lot of different emotions for me, as I am not lucky enough to still have my momma, nor was I blessed enough to become a mom myself in this life.

I have, however, been blessed enough to have had – and still have – many strong women cross my path and influence my life.  Who thru their courage, determination, kindness and strength unwittingly played and continue to play a huge role in shaping the woman I am today.

We are who we are to a certain extent, and no one really ever forces us to change, but we have people that cross our paths all thru our lives who change our mold, who force growth in us without even trying, who push us to our next level we didn’t even know existed until we arrived there.  And for me, there has been a long list of beautiful, smart, courageous, strong, capable & loving women that didn’t change who I was at my core but helped me find and become the best version of myself.

Strength and Grace was a lady named Hope.  Thru a lifetime of mistakes and bad choices, thru the years of living under the thumb of her own overbearing, controlling mother, she never lost her grace or her will to be the life of the party.  She never met a stranger, everyone was a friend, there was no end to what she would do for the people she loved.  Even people that didn’t really know her were in awe of her presence because she treated everyone as if they were family. She was the essences of giving and asking for nothing in return.  But if you ever crossed her or hurt anyone she loved, man oh man, did you have hell to pay!  She was, and still is the fiercest lady I have ever had the pleasure to share this earth with, and I was lucky enough to call her Mom, if only for a short time in this life.  She is and will always be my biggest inspiration and the wind beneath my wings.  Thanks Mom, I love you and miss you!

Strength is a lady named Maria.  Maria is the epitome of the American Dream and creating a better life for her children and her children’s children for generations to come.  She came to this country to make a better life for her and her kids.  She came with not much of anything but a dream and a determination that her children would do great things and leave their marks on this world.  Maria ended up making a wonderful life for herself and her children, all 9 of them, yes I said 9!  That in itself should take the strength of 5 women, yet she did it alone and made it work.  Her integrity, work ethic, strength and determination led all of her children to do well in this world.  They all have wonderful, prosperous lives, they all turned out to be wonderful, giving, loving, strong people who are now raising children of the same caliber thus solidifying Maria’s Legacy.  She may be one tough lady, but she gets the job done and you always knew even thru her toughness that she truly loves her children and I am lucky enough to be a part of her legacy since I was three years old.  Maria and her kids taught me what a real family should look like.  No matter how big or small your family is, you take care of each other, you work hard and you are always – no matter what – there for each other.  Strength and Perseverance is a lady named Maria.

I have been blessed with so many strong women throughout my life I could write a book and still not cover them all.  Some were brief encounters and some lasted for years, but each one added a block, a layer to who I became and who I continue to become. We are always growing, learning, changing until we leave this earth, this life, for what awaits us on the other side.  I know I will cross paths with many more ladies who will have much to teach me and how lucky I will be to find them.  Until then I would like to thank and tell some of the wonderful ladies, mom’s, sister’s, friends who have had starring roles in the play that has been and continues to be my life.

Strength is a Lady named Tina.  Her determination, perseverance and strength taught me to not quit.  I was quite the quitter back in my younger years, but not her, she was responsible back when it was a time to not be, and no matter how much it sucked, she never quit, she never called in sick, she never let what she wanted to do stop her from doing what she needed to do.  She found time to be able to do it all, and do it all well and still have a blast in the process.  She is grounded, strong and undeterred and a constant in my life that has seen me thru some of my darkest times.  Thank you for teaching me to push thru even when I don’t want to.

Strength is a Lady named Doris.  Her softness and patience taught me how to handle difficult situations.  It showed me how to deal with life with grace and dignity.  She taught me how to be soft, how to speak gently and how to try and understand life from the eyes of others.  She genuinely wanted to help people and make them feel better about themselves.  There never was a mean bone in her body.  Sure, she could get saucy and sassy, but never mean and always with love.  She is both strong and soft all at the same time.  An inspiration to all who know her.

Strength is a Lady named Marylou.  She taught me how to dream and dream big.  When we were kids I was always in awe of everything she dreamed of doing and being, especially at such a young age and coming from such modest beginnings.  Even if all of her dreams were to never come true she was brave enough to have them and believe in them whether they happened or not.  She taught me that having dreams will lead us to where we are meant to be, doing what we are meant to be doing.  That dreams will transform, change and morph into new dreams throughout our lives and the dreams we dreamt when we were kids may not be the dreams that come true for us in our adult lives but they opened the doors to endless possibilities and help us become who we are.

Strength are Ladies named, Mary, Miriam and Marlene.  These ladies are the ones that kept their family moving in the right direction.  They helped their mom raise all of their brothers and sisters.  They took over when they were needed and are a big part of the strength behind their mom’s legacy. Each one of them taught me something.  Mary taught me independence, she was the first teenager I knew growing up who got a job, had a car, and put herself thru college all while still helping raise her siblings.  Miriam taught me to love who I am, to see the beauty in myself even if no one else did.  She taught me it’s ok to be myself and love the things I love even if others find it silly or don’t get it.  Marlene taught me about hard work.  To never say you can’t, or your not strong enough for a job.  Seeing how she worked around her family’s home inside and out, and doing things most women couldn’t or wouldn’t made me understand that you don’t have to depend on others to do the hard jobs, just get your ass out there and do it because you can even if you think you can’t.

Strength is a Lady named Anne.  Anne is a very special lady, one of the first and only people that sees in me what my momma saw.  She builds me up and pushes me higher with her love, and praise just like my own mom would have.  She believes in me and helps me believe in myself.  She taught me about grace and elegance.  She carries herself with confidence, is also strong and soft all at the same time.  She is the epitome of what being a real lady is all about.

Strength is a Lady named Susan.  The day I met Susan, it was the first day at a new job and I was convinced I was in way over my head.  I was upset that I couldn’t do it, that I would fail, and she comforted me, a virtual stranger, and even offered to trade the job she loved and was awesome at with the one I currently hated, just so I wouldn’t be scared of failure or want to give up.  She was willing to sacrifice the position she loved for someone she just met.  It never came to that because she supported me, helped me, encouraged me, taught me about business, how to treat people in the business world and proper business etiquette, and now fourteen years later I am all but running that same company.  I owe my career to her, and for that I am very Thankful!

Strength is a Lady named Dana.  Dana taught me to be ok with being alone, being with myself, depending on myself and being happy with just me, myself and I.  She grew up with epilepsy and never knew when a seizure would strike, but that never slowed her down.  She lived on her own, she put herself thru college, she held a job and was very successful at it, all while dealing with something that I don’t know if I would have had the strength to endure.  She finally had surgery late in her twenties to correct the issue causing the epilepsy but that came after she had already achieved so much, and that again is something that took courage, strength and faith. She continues to teach me new things, she believes in me and encourages me to follow my dreams. She was a sister to me long before I knew I had one.  I am grateful for her love and support every day.

Strength is a Lady named Carol.  Carol has taught me what attitude really means.  This lady has been put thru the ringer since I have known her and she remains upbeat, positive and excited about life.  How she does it, I may never know, but I am always in awe of it when I witness it firsthand.  She lost her husband a few years ago, and as if that wasn’t enough, she found our she had breast cancer.  Soon after, she learned her mother also had cancer.  And after many rounds of her own chemo, she got on a plane to go take care of her mom.  Sadly her mom passed but Carol remained positive even thru the pain.  She came thru her breast cancer and survived it.  I found out that was the third time she had beaten cancer.  She is now dealing with the big C again, for the fourth time and even in the face of something so utterly terrifying to most of us, she is the same.  Upbeat, positive, has more life to live and an attitude that she will beat it again because she still has too much left to do.  And ya know what, I BELIEVE HER!  If she can stay positive thru all of that, surely I can do my best to be positive thru whatever I have to face in my life. Thank you for showing me what true courage is.

Strength is a Lady named Jennifer.  Jennifer is the most recent influence and teacher in my life.  If I told you she was my sister you might wonder, how is that recent then if she’s your sister?  Well, we never knew about each other until late into our twenties and even then, neither of us was ready or at a place to foster and grow our relationship the way it needed.  But in the last year and a half, we finally became true sisters.  We found each other again and have vowed to never let go.  She is reminding me what it means to have someone that is actually a part of you.  Since all of my childhood family is gone, I had lost that and feared I would never get it back.   I would never feel like I truly belonged.  Don’t get me wrong, all of the ladies in this blog and people in my life have loved me and included me, called me daughter and sister, and I am very grateful for that wonderful blessing and love everyone one of them for it.  But finally having someone again that shares your same DNA and loves you for that alone and vice versa, that is the icing on the cake.  We spend hours getting to know each other, supporting each other, encouraging each other and I am very thankful she is my big sister.  She is teaching me about forgiveness and understanding.  She has been thru her own struggles as we all have, but she is starting to blossom again.  I am so happy to have a front row seat for that, and in turn, she is encouraging me and my own self – transformation.   Jennifer is the best gift my mother ever gave me.  The situation wasn’t ideal or what we would have chosen, but we are happy with where we ended up all the same.  I love you Sis!

We all have special ladies in our lives that have helped us become who we are and today on this Mother’s Day, I wanted to just tell the world about some of the people who I have and do look up to, who have played – and still play – a part in who I am today.  Thank you all for being a blessing to me at just the right times in my life when I needed you most.  I am eternally grateful and a better person for knowing you all.  I love you and wish you all a very Happy Mother’s day.